Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
