God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
