i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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