I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
you are never too drunk for berry picking
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize