hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
