i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
pray to the hookup gods
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize