I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
