I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
