I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
