Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
