How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize