i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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