take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
You are the jesus of drinking
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Randomize
