I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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