It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
