are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
