I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize