Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
