If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
