hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
