Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
