Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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