is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
