so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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