My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize