hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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