They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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