i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
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