she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
How does one acquire holy water?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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