Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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