I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Randomize
