oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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