just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Randomize
