The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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