Yo dont text me then not text me
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Randomize