another moral hangover. fuck.
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I think people are normalizing furries
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
