Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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