please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
