I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
you win again, gameday.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
