You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize