i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
