big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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