I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
