You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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