well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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