Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
