she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Randomize
