I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize