he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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