OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Randomize
