Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
