508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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